saturday, february 21:
i bussed down to whyte so i could pick up some carrots at the farmers' market. i also stopped at megatunes to visit jessica for a while. that's really the only time i ever seen her nowadays. in the afternoon, i tutored cree. in the evening, jordan called and asked if i wanted to hang out. we went to latitude 53 for their fundraiser "53 ways to leave your lover." i was hoping to learn about ways to leave my lover, but it was all just art. art that had no advice on leaving lovers. boo. i think jordan had tickets for a show at starlite, but i don't really like shows and i guess he didn't have anyone else to go with, so we didn't go. he dropped me off at home after latitude 53 and i crafted.

sunday, february 22:
i went to cameron library to pick up a journal article for an annotated bibliography i had to write on northwest coast trade. on my way back, i ran into adam (moby) from king's. at 2:00, bri picked me up and we went to flirt cupcakes because she loves cake and her birthday was later that week. after that, we went to her house and waited around for dawn to show up. then the four of us, along with bethany and jamie, went to phoenix range for the v.i.p. segment of bri's birthday party. we shot 9mms and revolvers, and i LOVED it. i also liked how the lead made my throat taste all sweet afterwards. that's probably not a good thing. bri and i have intentions of going there again. i rode back to bri's with karen, and we were all joined by joel, lewis, geneva, curtis, andrea, lauren, and probably some other people who i am forgetting right now. i stayed in the living room all night and knitted while watched the oscars' red carpet show (hosted by tim gunn, who is majorly crushed on by me and natasha) and the oscars themselves. it was a really, really, really nice night. i hope that i can find a way to hang out with those people more often. andrea drove me home at the end of the night.

monday, february 23:
i tutored cree and worked at the elementary school. at 2:00, my social impact assessment class got on a yellow school bus and drove to tofield for a field trip. we have been given a class project that involves conducting an impact assessment on the coal gasification project that has been proposed in that area, so we met first with the mayor and a counselor and then with some local interest groups. we got home around 6:00 and i worked on my annotated bibliography until levi called at around 11 for our regularly scheduled monday evening chat.

tuesday, february 24:
i didn't work at the elementary school OR tutor cree like usual, and instead spent that time studying for my educational info. tech. midterm. it was 77 multiple choice questions. i thought i did pretty well on it, because, come on, i know computers and i know education... but i ended up with 79%, which i think is my worst mark yet in this degree. eff.

wednesday, february 25:
i had a meeting for my non-profit board internship program from 8:00 until 10:00, which meant i had to skip my cree lab. my computer lab class was cancelled for the day, so i went home until i had to work at the elementary school. the temperature was colder than -23 with the wind chill, so we stayed inside for recess. i played dodgeball in the gym with the div. 1 kids. after that, i tutored cree and then spent the rest of the evening working on that annotated bibliography.

thursday, february 26:
natasha picked me up at 11, just after my cree class, and drove me to massey sewing so i could pick up my machine (which had been serviced) and our scissors (which had been sharpened). i didn't have to work at the elementary school because it was a professional development day. i handed in my annotated bibliography in class, and tutored cree at 3:45. after my computers class, i took the #51 to natasha's, where we watched "breakfast at tiffany's." i caught the bus home at 10:03.

friday, february 27:
i visited the executive of the native studies students' association at their fundraising barbecue near pembina hall around 11:00. i spent $14 on two bison burgers. yikes. but i did see a lot of people i know (stacey l., jay c., nate b., matt b., brett b.), which was nice. i had a 2-hour nap and started on some alterations on my new (and possibly gaudy) jacket. natasha picked me up around 6:15 and we drove to la cité francophone to watch her roommate kim's aerial performance in this variety-esque show "fly by night." there was also a magician. i love magic! it seriously makes me so, so happy. it does not make natasha happy, though. there were a lot of REALLY ridiculous and downright shitty acts that night, but the magician and the aerialists were really good. natasha and i sat with bethany and her parents, and my friends matt and jill sat in front of us. it was a nice little night. AND natasha and bethany saw my "possibly gaudy" jacket and confirmed that it wasn't entirely gaudy, and possibly even wearable, so that was encouraging.

saturday, february 28:
i woke up to find a text on my phone from jordan, saying he had broken up with his girlfriend. we met at around 12:30 for cupcakes and a little talk. i went home and tutored cree for an hour, and then came home and worked on homework. oh, i had also spent the morning finishing the alterations on my new coat, because i wanted to wear it that night. i had a good occasion to wear it, along with the new dress i had bought at the royal bison (and new shoes, and new tights...), at my sister's ukrainian dance performance in fort saskatchewan. i usually dread going to these things, but my mom always makes us go as a family. it turned out that this one was pretty good. i like this dance company (volya) better than my other sister's dance company (which i will not name), mostly because this one is more traditional. quite honestly, i also think they have better dancers. this one girl named kelsey is probably the best female ukrainian dancer in the city, and a boy named nathan is the most joyful person i have ever seen perform. my favourite part was when emily played this mardi gras-esque sort of devil figure in a christmasy dance. she was certainly well-cast. my parents took us out for supper at boston pizza (the only restaurant we could find easily in fort saskatchewan), and then they headed back home and my sisters and i drove back to edmonton.

thursday, february 19th:
i worked at the elementary school at lunch, but supervised on the west playground instead of the east. i heard afterwards that my little grade one girls were pretty upset i wasn't around, and one of them even refused to let anyone else push her on the hill. kind of cute, but kind of sad. i don't want them to develop some sort of dependency on me. i just want us to have fun. after that, i tutored cree for an hour. then i met joel at leva at 4:00 and we ate pizza and talked and i knitted. bethany joined us around 5:00 for some dessert. i left around 5:30, and worked on some homework for a little before bussing down to natasha's. i knitted and she worked on her latest painting while we watched old "flight of the conchords" episodes. i bussed home around 10.

friday, february 20th:
i was a busy bee. i worked at the elementary school at lunch, then took the #9 downtown. i picked up four tickets for firefly theatre's fly by night performance for february 27th. the four tickets were for me, natasha (who is basically my new girlfriend - that weekend will be the fourth weekend in a row that we've hung out), jordan, and jordan's new girlfriend. ha. jordan and i saw one of firefly's productions in the summer, because his friend christian's fiancé molly was in it. this time, natasha's roommate kim will be in it. neat. and there will be magic! i love magic! and dogs! i don't love them so much, but sometimes dog trick stuff is so ridiculous that i enjoy it. i think there will be a bunch of other stuff happening too. anyway, after that i LRT'd to corona, and stopped at emily's work to pick up a registration form from her. we are going to do one of firefly theatre's "intro to aerial skill" classes together in april! i'm really looking forward to it. i especially hope that emily enjoys it, and maybe pursues more training in it. i think she'd be good at it. after that, i went to the great west life site library, an alberta government library on the NEOS system, to pick out some social impact assessments for a critique i need to do for a class. ugh. then i LRT'd back to the university, took the #4 down whyte, and got myself a vanilla cupcake with butter cream (creme?) frosting at the new cupcake place. i rated them to be 8/10 as good as whimsical cupcakes (i later found out that natasha rated them 7.2/10 as good). my dad called me RIGHT as i was waiting for the bus, and said he was in the city. apparently he was staying at emily's house overnight, and then attending a one-day class in preparation for a real estate course he wants to take. anyway, he picked me up on the way to my house, and dropped me off at home. i worked on cutting out a draft version of the top part of natasha's dress for a bit while he went to emily's to put his stuff away, and then he and emily picked me up and we went for supper at new asian village. mmm. my dad wasn't all that impressed with the food, and i wasn't all that impressed that the chocolate fondue spread offered no strawberries. meh. afterwards, i bussed to natasha's for her 6th "come over and draw" party. i sewed up the draft parts of natasha's dress and made her try it on. i still have to make some modifications that will kind of be a bitch. wish me luck. i spent the rest of the party knitting and eating oreos and tamtams (?) and cheezies. joel made a book about things to do while being naked; bethany laughed a lot about her cheezie-in-the-carrots "joke" on natasha; the closest natasha came to crafting was drawing personalized cups for guests; nathan drew a bible fight between himself and natasha; i think that kim and her friend and a girl named leanne and a girl named sarah all drew; and joel and megan sat in the corner and said funny things and did not craft and then went upstairs. bri showed up late and worked on editing her photos, i think. all in all, it was a super fun night. i really like being around all those people. i think i have slowly been adopting bethany's circle of friends, because they are just a really great group of people. i bussed home around 10:30 and went to bed.

sunday, february 15:
as far as i can remember, i just stayed home all day and crafted and watched "project runway" on youtube. i had planned on going to watch "the reader" by myself at the princess at about 3:30, but then my sister and i decided to go see "he's just not that into you" at 7:00, so i decided against going to see "the reader" that day. let me defend this decision: 1. i wanted to see it because natasha has seen it, and i wanted to be able to talk to her about it. i am finding that natasha has kind of morphed into a crush figure for me, and i do things (like watch shitty movies) so that i can relate to her (even if it is only over our mutual wtf-ness of movies). that is kind of a relief, because i get annoyed with myself whenever i do that around boy crushes, but now i am realizing that maybe it's just normal because we like to be able to relate to people we are just getting to know. yeah? anyway: 2. i just wanted something brainless to watch. 3. my sister and i rarely hang out, so this was a nice chance for us to do so. anyway, we drove all the way down to south edmonton common, only to find that the show was just starting and there were seriously HUNDREDS of people in line. i would say at least 200, maybe more. it was ridiculous. the only time i've ever seen more people lined up at the movies was when i worked at silvercity and the last "matrix" film came out. ugh. we realized we probably wouldn't get in, and if we did, we'd miss a lot of the movie. so we went to fatburger for supper, and then came home and i napped, and then we caught the late show at north edmonton cinemas. like natasha, i have a cuteness crush on the main girl, but most of the characters were SUPER annoying, and i was extra annoyed at the end when ben affleck's character caved and proposed to jennifer aniston's whiney but consented-to-being-happily-unmarried character. come on! my critique can't get any more in depth than that. it was a dumb movie.

monday, february 16:
my parents came up for family day, and all five of us went to the royal alberta museum. i had wanted to see the new arctic exhibit, but i hadn't realized that family day was free admission. there were TONS of people there, and many of them brought their grimy, screechy little kids. it took me 15 minutes to find a parking spot (i had to wait 10 minutes in line just to get out of the parking lot, and then drive a few blocks east to park), and the arctic exhibit was a total write-off because it was so busy and hot. we thought we would probably leave right away, but my dad started looking at this mexican-albertan vaquero exhibit, and i went with my sisters and mom to check out the shoe exhibit, and by the time we had all moved onto the aboriginal gallery, we had all calmed down and were having a good time. this was especially surprising regarding my dad, because he is even more of a grumbler than i am. the museum had also set up little tables in the upstairs open area, so that each of the curators could show some of the behind-the-scenes work or collections that they have that visitors don't usually get to see. i love the museum! i thought we were ready to go, but then my dad got really excited about the bug room (which i love anyway), so we went in there too. we drove to west edmonton mall, stopping at michael's on the way so i could buy a bit of yarn. my dad doesn't really like sit-down restaurants, and frankly, i don't really either, so he persuaded us to eat in the food court. it was super busy, so we ended up sharing our 8-person table with a croatian couple. my dad really loves talking to strangers, so he spent the whole meal ignoring us and talking to the croatian man. now it makes sense to me why he loves food courts: cheap food, and potential new friends everywhere. we stopped at ticketmaster so my mom could pick up tickets for shumka's 50th anniversary show (which will be alyssa's last show before she "retires" from dance), as well as chapters and hmv (where my dad bought two western dvd's, including "young guns II." yesss. i love "young guns."). my parents dropped us off at home and, as always, i crafted. i finished my green knitted sweater! then i went over to emery's to check out the room in his house that i am thinking about renting post-april. the house is so cute! we'll see what happens...

tuesday, february 17:
i worked at the elementary school at 11:30. then natasha picked me up from home and drove me to massey sewing machines, where i dropped off my machine for servicing and some scissors for sharpening, and also bought an INCREDIBLE new pair of sewing scissors. one of my favourite things of all time is supersharp scissors. i like listening to them as they cut. i like that these new ones don't have any plastic on them. after that, we went to sig plach to pick up notions for the bridesmaid's dress i am making for natasha, and to ask about pre-washing the material she had bought from there earlier. it turns out that we can throw the fabric in BOTH the washer and dryer! good news! no one likes a dry-clean-only garment. no one. after sig plach, our errands were done, but natasha decided she could not go home without stopping for a cupcake. so we made a major detour to the southwest side to eat some incredible cupcakes at whimsical cupcakes. i had a chocolate cupcake with strawberry frosting, and a vanilla cupcake with blue (?) frosting. that frosting didn't have a flavour. just frosting-flavoured. i liked the vanilla one better. i love vanilla cake. natasha dropped me off at home and i watched some more project runway. i also started a new knitted sweater.

wednesday, february 18:
while i was watching "project runway canada" last week, i came across a designer whose clothes i wasn't really into, but i wanted to see if she had an online store. she did, and while most of her stuff was really not my style, i found this adorable jacket, and called her to see if i could order it. she sent it to me right away, and it arrived wednesday morning. the cut is super-cute, but the fabric is WAY gaudier than i imagined. in the picture it looks really good, but in real life it is just white cotton with yucky metallic gold. eek. if i am brave enough i will wear it out. maybe the cut is enough for it to be pulled off without question.
however, i need only remember that my sister CONTINUES to insist on wearing this monstrosity (trust me, it is even worse in real life), and i can rest assured that i can never be the ultimate family fashion disaster. anyway, after receiving the jacket, i tucked it into my bag so that i could take it to the tailor's on whyte to have it taken in a bit. before that, though, i worked at the elementary school and stopped by bri's work for a quick little visit. the tailor ended up pinning my jacket in a way that was way simpler than i had imagined, so i told her i'd just do it myself at home. she was (understandably) a little grumpy and made me take all the pins out, but whatever. i'm not paying $30 for two seams up the sides. come on. on my way home, i stopped at the bank to deposit some money. i still don't know what's happening for me this summer, but i don't plan to be financially unprepared for whatever it may be. i tutored cree at 3:00, and then started working on some of the assignments i've been avoiding all week. at 5:00, i LRT'd to city hall, where i met nathan. we went skating (my first time all year - i try to go at least once a season) and then we walked down to mucho burrito on 109th for supper because we couldn't find anything interesting and relatively cheap to eat in between there and city hall. i really enjoyed my burrito, and i enjoyed our conversation. it was mostly about nathan's christianity. i like talking about stuff like that. however, i didn't have enough energy to talk about it for very long. i took the LRT home and crafted a bit and went to bed.

saturday, february 7:
natasha picked me up around 8:30 or so and went and set up our arts and crafts for the royal bison. we had about half an hour extra before people started coming at 10, so we walked to starbucks and back. i am not into starbucks very much except for their cupcakes, but natasha is a fanatic. and i like walking, so it all worked out well. sitting at our shared table all day was pretty enjoyable. i spent the morning hand-sewing the edges for that quilted wall hanging for my mom that i posted a picture of a few weeks ago. i spent the rest of the afternoon knitting my green sweater. becky, shannon, and jenni came and visited me, and brought angela, sarah, justina, chris, jeremy, and shamira. i also saw adrienne and alexia, some girls from high school. nathan dropped by to see natasha and ended up staying for the rest of the afternoon. he was lots of fun to hang out with. bethany came to watch natasha's table while natasha and her sister went cupcake-tasting for the upcoming wedding. natasha even brought back mini cupcakes for bethany, nathan, and me! i sold about half of my things that day, and made about $250 or so (i had 3 wallets, 2 shoulder bags, 12 wall hangings, and 10 pairs of mittens). i used $115 of that to buy a cute little grey wool dress. i will try to post a picture of me in it soon. natasha drove me home at 5, and we were both feeling pretty exhausted. i think i just spent the rest of the evening crafting and internetting. the usual.

sunday, february 8:
natasha picked me up again, but this time at 9:30. sunday wasn't as busy at the royal bison as saturday had been. one highlight was seeing the boy i had gone on a hand-holding date with about 10 months ago. i still don't know his name. thankfully, he didn't see me and we didn't talk. i think that would have ruined the awesomeness of that date. jordan also met me at opa while i was eating lunch so he could drop off a few of my things. i crafted the same as the day before, finishing my mom's wall hanging in the morning and knitting my sweater in the afternoon. nathan came again and sat with us all day, which, again, was pretty fun. julia visited me. i didn't sell as much on sunday, which wasn't a big surprise. i think i still made about $200, but that is partially because the mother of the boy i tutor picked me up afterwards so i could tutor cree, and she bought one of my shoulder bags (which i had priced pretty high, because i wasn't sure i wanted to sell them and because i had hand-appliquéd the little animals on) and a pair of mittens. so. tutoring afterwards. the family picked me up a sub from subway for supper, which was pretty nice, and then drove me home afterwards. i spent the evening drafting a letter to nathan. he told me a few months ago that we couldn't be friends because he already had enough female friends. BUT since natasha is thinking about moving to seattle this summer, i figured there would be an opening available. so i e-mailed him this:
"February 8, 2009

Nathan XXXXX XXXXXX
Edmonton, AB


To Whom It May Concern:

Re: “Female Friend” Opportunity

I am writing to express my interest in the Female Friend position in your social circle.
I have been advised that the departure of Natasha XXXXXX in July 2009 will leave an availability in your limited and exclusive Female Friend collection.
Having been a former applicant and then deemed unworthy of this position, I am writing to assure you that my potential for Female Friendness has grown tenfold since our last discussion.
I am interested in this position because I believe we are destined to be best friends (cf. circa 2005). I have significant experience and skill in conversation, awkward-silence-enjoying, onion-face-making, crafting-and-movie-watching, and t.v.-show-line-quoting, and butter-chicken-from-the-curry-fix-eating.
I would welcome the opportunity to further discuss my skills and this position. I can be reached by telephone at (780) XXX-XXXX, or by e-mail at this address. Please find my references attached. I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours truly,

Caylie XXXXX

References

Natasha XXXXXX
Friend, 2007-2009
Acquaintance, 2006-2007

Jenni XXXXXXX
Friend, 2006-2009
Enemy, 2005-2006
Friend, 2004-2005
Acquaintance, 2002-2004

Bethany XXXXXX
Friend, 2003-2009
Acquaintance, 2001-2003"
and then i waited for a response.

monday, february 9:
this was my sister's 21st birthday. i didn't get her anything (although i planned to get her a dairy queen ice cream cake, but didn't have the time or opportunity to go get it that day), which is normal for me because i am bad at planned gift-giving. BUT she didn't get ANY presents from ANYONE (my parents knew they were going to get her a camera, but hadn't been up to the city to pick it up yet), so she cried about it. eek. i skipped the elementary school and tutoring that morning so i could study for my social impact assessment midterm. i think it went pretty well.

tuesday, february 10:
the same as every other tuesday, except that i didn't have to tutor cree from 3:45 until 4:45. it was a nice break. my sisters and i drove to dairy queen so i could buy alyssa a birthday cake. we all came back to the apartment to eat some. i think i am losing my appreciation for dairy queen cakes in favour of real cakes.

wednesday, february 11:
i had my cree lab in the morning, and then i went to my computers lab to do the library assignment. ugh. i worked at the elementary school and tutored cree. i had wanted to go to the royal alberta museum's birthday party for charles darwin (because of the free cupcakes), but decided to stay at home instead and study for my northwest coast archaeology midterm. jordan stopped by in the evening to drop off a framed picture of the garneau theatre, featuring "rocky horror" on the marquee.

thursday, february 12:
i went to all my classes, but didn't work at the elementary school or tutor cree like usual. instead, i studied. i wrote my archaeology midterm at 2:00. i think it went okay. i ran into both emery and courtney in HUB. it was nice to see them and talk to them both for a bit. i haven't seen either of them very much lately. in the evening, i went over to natasha's for our weekly project-runway-and-crafting date. as usual, it was great.

friday, february 13:
i went to talk to one of the elders at the aboriginal student services centre in SUB at 9:00. i tutored cree at 10:00, and worked at the elementary school at 11:00. i thought i had to work at a bake sale for the native studies students' association, but it apparently was cancelled, so i bussed down to whyte to check out the new yarn store there (!). in the evening, emily and i came with alyssa to hundred bar and grill, to celebrate alyssa's birthday with all her friends. but her friends are not really our type of people, and the place was super expensive and didn't look very appetizing anyway, and alyssa was ignoring us, so emily and i left. yes, we are jerks. we went to the upper crust and each bought a little valentine's day sugar cookie, and then ate the buffet at new asian village. i didn't know that on weekends they have a chocolate fondue! it is incredible! it was easily the best fondue i have ever had. emily and i couldn't help but be pleased with our decision, despite its jerkiness.

saturday, february 14:
the best part of my day was receiving this e-mail from nathan:

"To Ms. Caylie XXXXX,

This is a formal notice that your application for Female Friend has been received and is currently being processed.

As of late the number of positions for Female Friends has been decreased by my society’s board. As such it should be noted that competition for the last remaining spot is quite tight. Frankly, competition is nearly impossible. But, rest assured, as Head of the Committee for Social Circle Refinement I can ease a great deal of your potential anxiety. It has come to my attention through some of your references as well as sources of my own that you very well may be the right candidate. I’ve heard extraordinary things about your onion-face-making abilities. There is much deliberation left, but I’m positive that you’re a sure thing.

You should know that it is far without the committee’s policies to accept applications in written form. Orthodox procedure for considering new Female Friend applicants has always been in person. Despite this breach of etiquette, or quite possibly because of it, the majority of the board has found your application particularly intriguing.

The board will be holding open hearings this coming week. It would be within your favor to attend one of these meetings in order to state your intentions before the entire committee.

As it seems you are not entirely familiar with this procedure I would like to offer my guidance and perspective. Please respond as soon as possible with potential times for meeting that I might prepare you for your formal hearing.

Sincerely,

N. SXXXXX
Head of the Committee for Social Circle Refinement
NDS Society"

awesome. the only other notable part of the day is that i tutored cree for an hour and a half.

lighten up, it's just fashion

monday, february 2:
i worked at the elementary school, tutored cree, and then had class from 2 until 5. later in the evening, my friend levi called from toronto and said he had a couple of days with no commitments, and some free flight credits that would expire in april. he asked if he could come visit, and let me have an hour or so to deliberate. i went for a walk around garneau, specifically to buy some pumpkin spice chocolates (one for myself, and one to mail to robin). i weighed out the pros and cons. the main con was that i had a midterm scheduled for thursday that i really needed to study for. however, i realized i probably wouldn't get another chance to see levi any time soon, so i called him back and invited him to come.

tuesday, february 3:
i had a cree quiz, worked at the elementary school, had more class, tutored cree, had more class, and then went home. levi called from the bus shuttle dropoff, which is very conveniently located on my block, at about 6:30. he came up to my place and dropped off his bags, and then we went for a walk down saskatchewan drive. we turned south and walked along whyte to dadeo, where we ate supper. we came back home and just hung out. it was really nice. it certainly does a lot for one's self esteem to have someone else fly across the country last-minute for a few days for a hang out. i don't know if i've ever had that before.

wednesday, february 4:
i went to cree class at 9. i was dreading it because we were supposed to be playing pictionary, and i HATE games, especially pictionary. but it ended up being super fun! i really enjoy being around the people in that class, and most of the other native studies students in general. i skipped my educational info. tech. class because i had finished the lab last week, and skipped working at the school so i could hang out with levi. i did, however, tutor cree for an hour. levi and i ate brunch at earl's, and then bussed/lrt'd (sorry about the grammar on that one - i couldn't decide between LRTd and lrt'd. both are wrong. but you know what i mean) downtown and walked around for a bit. we lrt'd home, and i made levi leave me alone for a few hours so i could study/nap. he went to whyte ave for a while, and i stayed home and studied. when he got back, we walked to new asian village for supper. then we came home and hung out and went to bed.

thursday, february 5:
levi left at 7:30 in the morning to catch the sky shuttle to the airport. it was a nice visit. i skipped cree and working at the elementary school so that i could have some time to study for my exam. i wrote my alberta archaeology midterm at 12:30, but finished very quickly so i had an unexpected hour before my next class. i went home and called a guy, who had instructed me to call him for an interview for an internship i have applied to. i'm not sure how the interview went. the first question the guy asked me was, "describe yourself in 5 to 7 words: strengths, weaknesses, whatever. we just want to get an idea of who you are." two of the words i chose to describe myself were "moody" and "introverted." he seemed surprised that i said those things, and said i was the first interviewee to be honest with that question. apparently everyone else had just listed positive things. but he HAD asked me about weaknesses, and i think it is ridiculous if people can't recognize and admit to their weaknesses (although to be honest, i really don't see my introvertedness as a weakness anyway). the interview took a lot longer than i thought it would, and at around 2:00, the fire alarm in my apartment started going off. we had still not finished the interview, but the guy said i could call him back the next day. i went to my other classes and tutored cree in between, and then just crafted in the evening.

friday, february 6:
i had a good earth café date with my friend lindsay (who i worked at the legislature with) at 10:00. i left at 10:45 to finish my telephone interview. then i worked at the elementary school, and rushed back to good earth for a date with shannon at 12:45. i came home and crafted for the rest of the afternoon. natasha picked me up at 5, and we drove to the curry fix to pick up some butter chicken, rice, and naan bread. we came back to her house and crafted stuff for the royal bison and ate indian food while watching nearly 6 hours' worth of project runway. mmmhmm.

my trip to robin's:
first of all, all the passengers boarding in edmonton had their carry-on baggage searched and were scanned with a metal detector. hmm. must be new policies because of recent... you know.

i got to red deer at 5, but robin was not at the bus station to pick me up. that was because i had told him i was arriving at 7. oops. i called him and he drove over, and since i was feeling so exhausted i asked if we could go somewhere that i could eat steak to get some energy (robin is a vegetarian, and i don't even like cooking meat in my own house because of the smell, so i thought we should not cook at his house). it was a good good talk with lots of stories. i remembered that i had been extra cautious the summer that we hung out, because he is so so so rad and i really just needed him as a friend that summer, so i guess we weren't as close in reality as i thought we were in my head. but our conversation seemed to put our relationship into where my head had thought it had been anyway, so that was good. we came back to his house and just talked and talked and talked for hours. i told him it was nice hanging out with him because it felt like hanging out by myself. i think he was a little offended at first, but i meant that it was just so comfortable and easy and not stressful, and i didn't feel like i needed to entertain or be entertained. i could just be. and it was nice.

the next morning, i worked on sewing wallets for the royal bison, and robin worked on some stuff for his show on his computer. i had to mostly stay bundled up in a nest of 3 or 4 blankets because robin's basement suite cave is so effing cold. robin is into a lot of different podcasts, so we listened to some neat ones called "stuff you should know." later in the day, we visited robin's show at the art gallery, visited the museum (which has cree syllabics on a lot of its aboriginal sections! and a really incredible, long, carved narwhal tusk!), visited robin's office and studio at red deer college, got booster juices and some chocolate, and went to see "doubt" at the theatres. robin made me try his favourite movie snack, which is smarties sprinkled into popcorn. it was good, but i don't think i will become my favourite any time soon. afterwards we came home and drowsily watched "zoolander" on t.v., and then went to sleep.

on sunday i crafted some more, and robin worked on the recipe book for his show. i was wanting some tea, so i asked robin if red deer had a good earth café. they did! so we went there for lunch, and then walked around the mall for a bit. then we just came back to his house and did some more low-key hanging out until it was time for me to catch the bus.

i sure like robin a lot. i had such an amazing time with him the summer we were both up north, and now i am kicking myself for not making more of an effort to hang out with him since then. but it is okay. our friendship can handle it. but i really hope we will live in the same postal district again one day.

the bus ride home was kind of annoying, because the girl in front of me kept her little overhead light on even though she was sleeping. it didn't bother her, but it glared right into my eyes. when i got back into edmonton, the mother of one of the guys i tutor picked me up from the bus stop and drove me to their place, where i tutored cree for an hour. they also supplied some pizza and dessert from boston pizza for me and him, which was super nice. she drove me home and i fell asleep pretty quickly.

i should be studying. but school is so uninspiring this semester.

saturday, january 24:
i made alyssa drive me to the farmers' market to buy raspberry jam, onions, and carrots. we ran into jordan with a girl and i punched him in the arm and waved. he looked surprised to see me. afterwards i spent two hours tutoring cree. in the evening i made some "hangover soup" that darcy used to make. when we started being friends again, i told him that one of the reasons i had hoped we would reconcile is so he could tell me how to make that soup. it is true. i thought about that soup for years, and for good reason. i am glad to be friends with him again for other reasons too, don't worry.

sunday, january 25:
i visited jj at steeps. that girl.

monday, january 26:
i worked at the elementary school, tutored cree, went to class, met becky at good earth café for tea, and then met gerda, angela, and elise at steeps at 7:30. they are all really bright girls who went to king's, but i was never really friends with them then. but we all worked on the student publications while we were at king's, and now we are all involved in native/rural studies kind of stuff, so it was nice to hang out with them.

tuesday, january 27:
class, elementary school, tutoring.

wednesday, january 28:
class, elementary school. visited with my friend erin at good earth café at 5:30, where i also saw shannon and colin. erin has been learning to weave, and has made some pretty incredible woven scarves. i am so jealous! afterwards, emily (who was feeling yucky because of a breakup) came with me to natasha's for our weekly crafting extravaganza. natasha introduced me to project runway. my life will never be the same. how did i live this long without it? i have a pretty massive straight-girl-on-gay-boy-crush on austin scarlett. those dresses.

thursday, january 29:
class, elementary school, tutoring. crafting?

friday, january 30:
i tutored cree in the morning, and intended to work at the elementary school but cramps made me decide otherwise. alyssa graciously drove me to the greyhound station, stopping first at the grocery store for arrowroot cookies to calm my stomach. i boarded the bus at 3 to visit the incomparable mister robin l*mbert (sorry - i don't like putting people's full names on here because of search engines) in red deer. i put my ipod on shuffle (something i rarely do) and worked on knitting my green sweater. i really love riding on busses or driving on several-hour-long trips. i like where my brain goes.

monday, january 19th:
i met with my cree teacher for about an hour to talk about making a few small changes to the first- and second-year cree program. then i worked at the elementary school for an hour, tutored cree for an hour, and had my social impact assessment class for three hours. i rounded out the evening by watching recent "scrubs" episodes on my computer and downloading the arrested development soundtrack. that last part made me especially happy.

tuesday, january 20th:
i woke up to find that the fine leather rope that i have worn twisted around my left wrist since summer 2003 had broken for the very first time ever. a pretty monumental start to a pretty monumental day, i guess. i undid one wrap of the rope and re-tied it, so now there are only 9 wraps instead of 10. i seriously feel like a little part of me is gone. i had class all day between 9:30 and 6:30, interspersed with tutoring cree, working at the school, and meeting with the director of the aboriginal teacher education program (atep). i have applied for this program for next year, and it seems like it will be a really incredible program. basically, it is the 3rd and 4th years of an elementary ed. degree, but all the courses are taught from an aboriginal perspective. also, it is a cohort model, so students take ALL their courses together over the 2 years of the program. it's so perfect! the only problem is that it isn't going to run if less than 25 students register. boo. i don't think they are going to get that many. therefore, the reason i met with the director that day was to gather some materials to take over to king's to advertise the program during their winter semester i.s. conference.

wednesday, january 21st:
i skipped class, work at the school, and tutoring to take in the first day of king's i.s. conference on the truth and reconciliation commission and residential schools. i sat with matt, angela, naomi, and dan, all of whom i know through a combination of native studies at the u of a and english/students' association at king's. i also saw karen and dr. z., as well as a couple of girls from vermilion who now attend king's. i left the conference a little earlier so i could catch the #80 (it only comes every half hour, i think), and then met julia at good earth café for tea. later, i bussed down to whyte to meet natasha and bethany at the chapters starbucks for crafting and cupcakes. it was good to see bethany, especially because i don't get to see her as much as i'd like to. she is very crafty and creative and i am often very inspired by her. it was also, of course, good to see natasha. i like being around her because i think we share the same addiction to creating and dislike for most social situations.

thursday, january 22nd:
class allllll day. elementary school at lunch; tutoring cree in the afternoon. jenni came over around 8:00 for a visit. it was good to see her and hear about how she spends her time and energy.

friday, january 23rd:
i tutored cree for an hour, and then took the LRT downtown, where i met darcy for lunch at the curry fix. oh, i guess i didn't write much in november, so you may or may not know that darcy and i, after a disastrous break-up and 2 years of not speaking, are friends again. and it is great. he is interesting and irreverent about things that people should be irreverent about, and reverent towards things that should be revered, and i am grateful to be able to converse with him again. more importantly, i am grateful to have someone accompany me to the curry fix, which is conveniently located but INCONVENIENTLY only open from 11-3 on weekdays. after lunch, i met meghan at the bus stop, and we took the #5 to bearclaw gallery, which she needed to review for an art education class. we visited MEC afterwards and stopped for vanilla bean hot chocolates at second cup, and then went home. i spent the rest of the night crafting.

on monday, i tutored cree for an hour after working at the elementary school. then i had my 3-hour social impact assessment class. i rushed out of class at 4:50, and caught the LRT and then the #151 to the nina haggerty centre for the arts for our board meeting. when the meeting ended at 7:30, i LRT'd to emily's condo because she had invited me for supper. i am never one to turn down a free meal. she made some pretty impressive lemon chicken and potatoes and steamed vegetables, and i watched CSI: miami on her couch and ate handfulls of bailey's chocolates (i don't like the bailey's, but i am also not one to skip on free chocolate).

on tuesday i had cree, then the elementary school, then alberta archaeology. my northwest coast archaeology class was cancelled that week because our professor was in japan, so i took advantage of the free time and LRT'd to the north-end michael's, where i spent too much money on yarn. i bought a couple of different kinds: one was 100% wool in cognac heather, the others were 70% bamboo and 30% silk, in moss and bark. i'll be making two sweaters for myself from these. exciting! i've already started on the moss-colored bamboo and silk one. after michael's, i had my educational information technology class from 5:00 until 6:30. ugh.

on wednesday i had cree at 9, my 3-hour IT lab at 10 (although i finished my assignment as was out by 10:45), the elementary school at 11:25, and tutoring at 1. i spent the afternoon crafting at home, and then walked to natasha's (i missed the bus by SECONDS, and it was beautiful out anyway) for some royal bison crafting time. on the way home, i missed the bus again, so it was a solid 50-block round trip. i didn't mind at all, though. i like long walks by myself, as long as the weather is not windy and warmer than -15.

thursday was the same as tuesday, although my michael's excursion was substituted by a tutoring session at good earth café with a new student named nate. i think it went reasonably well. oh, i also ran into my friend meghan that day, who invited me to some bar opening on friday. i haven't seen her in a long time, so i decided to go.


on fridays, the only thing i REALLY have to do is work at the school over noon hour. it was really nice and sunny out, so i decided to put on my snowpants so i could go tobogganing with the kids, or at least not get wet knees when i pushed them. i ended up sledding the whole time, and it was ridiculously awesome. i'ma wear my snowpants there more often. after that, i came home and changed and then went to rutherford house for afternoon tea by myself. it is really hard to get a reservation there for the weekend, and everyone i talk to isn't free to go when i am during the week, so i decided to just go alone. i didn't mind one bit. after that, i went to go talk to the lady in charge of our non-profit board placements. i have been having trouble picking a project, but after a long, thoroughly enjoyable discussion, we decided my project would just be researching various potential fundraisers. i think it is a very fitting project. later in the evening, i took the #7 to meet meghan and some of our mutual friends at that bar, but i didn't stay long. i wanted to walk home, since it was another beautiful evening. i crafted, of course, when i got home. i also booked a bus ticket to go visit my incredible friend robin in red deer in two weekends from now. exciting!

i also crafted all morning on saturday. i tutored cree for an hour at 2:30, and then came home for a bit. then i walked to megatunes to visit jessica for a little bit, and stopped at american apparel on my way home. i also went to the movie studio and rented three movies. i watched "the delicate art of parking" and "the piano teacher" that night while crafting, and then watched "the page turner" this morning while crafting. they were all okay, but not really great. today i took the movies back, went to earth's general store to refill my shampoo and conditioner bottles, and bought some bread and juice at safeway. i have been trying to do some reading for class since then, but my brain is entirely disinterested.

the pictures here are of bison, moose, and mammoth wall hangings i have made for the royal bison. i have a couple more coming - the animals are cut out of a dark brown pinecone fabric. i really like the way the brown swirly fabric accentuates the bisonness, mooseness, and mammothness of each of the figures.

this is the sweater i've been knitting for myself - my very first knitted sweater that i've ever made! i slightly modified some patterns i found on ravelry. the yarn is 70% wool and 30% soy, and the buttons are brown, burgundy, and beige.

on friday, i worked at the elementary school at noon, and then spent the early afternoon internetting. i've been considering making a website for my crafting stuff, but i'm not sure i want to invest money into it, especially since i can't get the domain name i want.

jessica came over at 3:00, and we both crocheted and drank tea and talked. we haven't crafted together for a long time, so it was really nice. i made some spaghetti for myself for supper, and then got on the LRT. kaylin met me at central station, and she looked INCREDIBLY cute. she is pretty cute in general, but her hair is pretty short now and she has started to curl it in a really pretty way. we LRT'd to belvedere, and then took a bus to londonderry mall. there, we went to "the laugh shop" for shannon's birthday party, which started at 7:00. the comedians were mediocre to terrible, but it was nice to see old friends, including jeremy, chris, and evan, and of course shannon. afterwards we went to a sketchy bar in the mall because everyone else wanted to karaoke, but i hate karaoke and bars, so i mostly just knitted my sweater. i also knitted it during the comedians. i'm glad i did it, too, because i got a lot of work done. at about 11:30, kaylin and i walked out to the bus stop and headed home. it was so good to hang out with her. she is so bright and creative and bitter and sarcastic and funny and cute and irreverent. i wish we could hang out more often.

monday, january 5th was the first day of the winter semester of school. this semester, i don't have class on any day between 11:25 and 12:25, so have been working as a noonhour supervisor at the elementary school i worked at last year. it is pretty enjoyable. i mostly just toboggan or play dodgeball or floor hockey or watch movies with the kids. on friday i taught one of the new little girls how to toboggan, because her family originated in the middle east, then moved to ireland, and finally moved here, and she has never been tobogganing before. cute.

after supervising during the lunch hour on monday, i was supposed to tutor cree, but the boy i tutor and i were both busy with beginning-of-term stuff. i had my first class at 2 p.m. it is AREC 550: social and economic impact assessments. the downsides about the class are that it is a 3-hour long class every monday afternoon, and it seems like it will be a lot of work. the upside is that we get to do a REAL social impact assessment on a community about an hour southeast of edmonton. neat! i am pretty excited about that part. after class, jessica and i went to see slumdog millionaire. it is pretty incredible, and you should see it if you get a chance.

on tuesday, i had cree at 9:30, the elementary school at 11:25, alberta archaeology at 12:30, northwest coast archaeology at 2:00, and educational information technology at 5:00. i also bussed down to "earthly goods" (a quilting store) to buy iron-on applique stuff. earlier that day, natasha had invited me to share her table at the next royal bison. exciting! so i had to go to the quilting store to get some materials for the appliqué wallhangings i was planning on making for the royal bison. i also managed to snag my sister's car after my last class, and i bought a ton of groceries at both sunterra and safeway, and also went to michael's to buy some embroidery hoops for the aforementioned wall hangings. in addition to all this crafting, i am also trying to make myself cook nutritious, full meals more often, so that is why i stopped at the grocery stores three different times that night.

on wednesday i had my cree lab at 9:00. my computer lab was cancelled that day, but i worked the noonhour supervision thing (we played dodgeball) and then i tutored cree at 1:00. i crafted all afternoon, and then made some spicy chicken pizza for my sister and myself for supper. my sister drove me to natasha's at 7. we crafted and drank tea and strategized for the royal bison and listened to memorable songs from high school. she also lent me the 3rd season of "the office."

thursday was pretty much the same as tuesday, with an absence of shopping and a pizza reprise.

every new day seems so new

my mom drove me back to edmonton on december 30th. she slept over because she wasn't sure if the roads were good, and alyssa's bed was free because alyssa was in cuba for a vacation. while she was here, my mom cleaned my whole kitchen, and now i am trying really hard to keep it clean and do my dishes every day instead of letting them pile up. i have been pretty good at doing so, but alyssa isn't. inspired by my mom, i decided to clean up more of my house. i borrowed emily's carpet cleaner and good vacuum, and set to work cleaning, vacuuming, and sorting out/purging all my piles of papers and junk. i spent the rest of my christmas holidays doing that and crafting, but if you came and visited i doubt you'd even be able to tell that i cleaned much. but i did! i am really trying to do all that cleaning because alyssa is moving out in april, and i am either stuck with having to pay the entire amount of rent myself, or find a roommate. there's a possibility that jessica might move in with me in the spring, but i think that kind of depends on where she is working at that time. she often goes up north to work at a camp, so i'm not sure if she'll be around. i hope we do eventually get to live together, though, and i hope it goes well. i know i can be pretty hard to live with.

anyway. the rest of my christmas holidays went like this:

i spent new year's eve at what used to be the velvet underground, watching illfit outfit play. jenni, jessica, jonathan, and landon were all there, and it was really nice to see all of them. however, i hate bars and i hate new year's and i hate being out after dark, so jessica, jon, landon and i left as soon as illfit was done at 11:15. they dropped me off at home, where i spent the next few hours working on a sweater i had started knitting for myself. it is my first knitted sweater, and i will post pictures when it is done.

on new year's day, i spent the morning working on my sweater some more. in the afternoon, i took the LRT and then the #5 (i think) to government house (just south of the royal alberta museum) for the lieutenant governor's new year's levee. i've never been before, and i'm glad i went. i mostly just stood in line for a long time, but i got to see the inside of government house (which was built in 1913 for the first lieutenant governor, but hasn't been used as a residence since the 1930s or so), signed the LG's guestbook, shook hands with the LG and his wife, and (this is the best part) had some really incredible little cakes and roast beef sandwiches. a historical tour and some great free food? this year is off to a good start.

the next day, i met my cree student at rutherford library for a tutoring session. later that evening, i bid on this on ebay. i have been wanting to re-line my blue winter jacket ever since i bought it, and this year it is dirty and ripped enough for me to actually get started on that. my mom is going to give me her mom's old brown mink coat to cut up and line my coat with, but i want some white or grey fur to line the hood and bottom and sleeves. don't think i'm a terrible person, okay? these coats are all second-hand, and fur is warm and edmonton is freezing. also, it turned out that someone outbid me at the last second, so i am still looking for old white fur coats to cut up for it. rabbit is easy to find, but it is not very good to wear because the hairs fall out really easily. are you appalled by me yet?

on saturday, the mom of the boy i tutor came over to drop off my pay for december, and then drove me to the farmers' market. i got potatoes, carrots, fudge, onion, garlic, and raspberry jam. i bussed home and worked on my sweater some more.

on sunday, i went for a late lunch with my friend erica. we rowed together at the u of a last year, and then i stayed at her place in halifax when she moved there this summer. we went to dadeo, and had a perfect perfect hangout. it was just long enough to catch up and have a really great conversation. she is so creative, and i love hearing what she has been up to (she is taking jewelry design craft at NSCAD in halifax). i spent the evening printing out hundreds of pages of notes for my northwest coast archaeology class, which was kind of a pain in the ass but nice that we didn't have to buy a textbook. our professor actually scanned every page that we will need, and made them available through e-class. impressive.

natasha's right - i AM trying to blog more often this year.

so here are the details from christmas:

i drove from edmonton to my parents' on the afternoon of christmas eve. my sisters and dad and i all went into town to visit my grandparents at the lodge. then we came home and did our traditional christmas eve gingerbread cookie decorating. we also ate perogies for supper. we aren't really all that traditional, but because of my dad's ukrainianness, we aren't allowed to eat any meat on christmas eve. so although i had been looking forward to a big, meaty meal after all that travelling, i was stuck with just perogies. boo.

we opened our presents on christmas morning (i thought i'd point that out, because other people do it other times, you know?). i mostly got money, but i also got two things of second cup vanilla bean hot chocolate mix (my favourite!) from emily, a $25 gift card to chapters from alyssa, and - here's the best one - the gift from my parents was to have the quilt i've been working on for the last year and and a half quilted (if that doesn't make sense, here's an explanation: i sewed all the pieces together to make the pattern on top and the backing, but someone with an industrial-sized machine is going to quilt the top, batting, and backing together. once i get it back, i'll have to hand-sew the binding around the edges). here is a sneak peek. when i took this picture, i still hadn't sewed on the two borders around the main part. so, this is called a log cabin quilt. mine has 64 squares, and each square is made up of 17 strips of fabric. apparently, "quilters are told that [each square] represents log cabins on the prairie with red center squares for the hearth, light values on one side for the sunny side of the house and dark values on the opposite side for the shady side of the house." neat, huh? so that's pretty much what i worked on for the week i was home during christmas. i didn't see any of my friends at all, but i talked briefly on the phone to jessica, dustan, and andrea. i also watched the entire 4th season of "the office," as well as "the dark knight" (which i didn't really like at all).

on christmas day, my grandma and gido and auntie lorraine and uncle pete came over to my parents' house, and we all had dinner at 1:00. the nicest thing from christmas was when i showed my gido bill my quilt after he had seen me cross-stitching (which i was doing partly because i don't like being in a room with a lot of people, even when it is my own family at christmas, and partly because i know my mom will never finish the stocking she started cross-stitching for alyssa), and he remarked, "boy, you are really something, caylie." it was a really simple sentence but felt really, really nice. i like to think that he likes that i am crafty and always busy, like my grandma. i sure do love my gido.

anyway... back to quilting. since i had a reasonable amount of fabric left from my quilt, and most of it was cut into 1.5" strips, i decided to try to make a star-blanket wallhanging with the scraps. it's about 20" x 20", and my mom is going to put it up in her living room. i did the quilting of the layers on this one myself. i still have to handsew the binding onto three of the sides, and that's what you can partially see in the corner of this one. i really like it overall, and think that the next quilt i do will be in this pattern.

vancouver

i'ma try to write more often. there's just so much catching up to do... i'll have to just write about the last couple of weeks, for now.

classes finished on december 3, and i had three finals scheduled plus one 10-page take-home final essay to do. the essay really stressed me out, but i finished it early so i could focus on studying. i wrote my native economic development final at 9:00 on thursday, december 11th, and then wrote my management of aboriginal natural resources final at 2:00 that same day. later that night i went to this girl alisha's house. i didn't really know her, but she used to be in native studies, and two of the girls i know from the faculty invited me to come, so i did, albeit reluctantly. i'm so glad i did! it was just the four of us there, and we just had a nice quiet night of talking about native studies stuff. it was really, really, really nice, especially because i don't often hang out with other NS majors. and those girls are all so bright and funny and aware and caring. i hope that i get to hang out with them more often this year, especially before one of them moves to yellowknife for a job with the government.

i spent most of that weekend inside because it was so freezing outside. also, i like crafting by myself.

on tuesday i wrote my cree midterm (it's a full-year course) at 9:00 a.m., and then came home and packed. i took the sky shuttle to the airport at 3:45, and then got on my plane to vancouver at 5:15. my friend caitlan, who i met this summer at the french immersion program, met me at the airport and we took the busses and skytrain back to her parents' house in burnaby. i was pretty tired, so we didn't do too much that evening except for talk. i also started teaching her how to crochet.

the next day, it started snowing like crazy. we went to the art gallery in burnaby, and in the evening we rented and watched "the diving bell and the butterfly." the next day, we took the train/bus to stanley park so i could see the totem poles there (although i don't feel very comfortable about them being there...), and then went back to burnaby to watch "milk" (which is incredible, and i highly recommend seeing!) at the theatre, and then went back to downtown vancouver to check out the art gallery. we also stopped at uncle fatih's pizza twice, and had the most incredible, cheapest pizza of all time (ie. two slices of spicy chicken pizza and a water bottle for $4). on our way out of the pizza place the second time, i ran into "math dave," who is the ONLY other person i really know who lives in vancouver. weird.

on friday the 19th, caitlan and i woke up at 5:30 (well, i woke up at 4:30 and couldn't fall back asleep because i was so excited) so that we could bus/train to the horseshoe bay ferry terminal to catch the 8:30 ferry to nanaimo. we also met up with three of caitlan's friends along the way. all of her friends were really bright and funny, and i was glad to spend time with them. within 15 minutes of nanaimo, huge, puffy snow started falling. ugh. so when we got to nanaimo, we decided to bus rather than walk to national car rental, where i had reserved a rental car for us. i impressed myself with my driving skills as i drove us up along highway 19, first to coombs (where we stopped at the old country market and the world parrot refuge. i had been to the market a few years ago when i went to visit my aunt and uncle in campbell river, but it was cute so i was glad to be back. i also enjoyed TWO pretty great butter chicken wraps, albeit somewhat self-consciously because of my all-vegetarian company. i had really been looking forward to the parrot refuge, but it turned out to be really really strange. first of all, because of all the snow, there was about 2 feet of snow surrounding the building, and only a little trail of one set of footprints that even showed where the entrance was. so first we walked into this one small building, which had about 70 birds squawking incredibly loudly, so we left that building in a hurry. we went into the larger building, and we could not see any humans anywhere, even though the building was open and the gift shop was unattended and hundreds of birds were flying around in their large cages. we didn't have time to take the self-guided tour of the refuge, and even if we had, none of us really felt like paying the $12-per-person entrance fee, so we left. we then drove to the incredible cathedral grove. i've been there once in the summer before, but never in winter, and neither caitlan nor her friends had ever been. it is really something else, and if you've never been, you should try to go at least once. i think it feels like one of the most sacred places i have ever been. it's an old-growth forest, and some of its trees are 800 years old! after walking around the grove, we headed back to nanaimo. we knew we had missed the 5:00 ferry, so we took our time returning the rental car and walking back down to the ferry terminal for the 7:00 ferry. we got home at around 10:30, feeling exhausted but happy.

caitlan worked the next day (at cobs bread), and i was so tired that i just stayed at her place and watched most of season 1 and 2 of "the office" while knitting sweaters for parrots. it's a good way to use up little bits of yarn, okay? when caitlan came back from work, she and her boyfriend and i watched some pink panther movie her boyfriend had rented. it was a little weird.

on my "last" day in vancouver, i packed up all my things and caitlan and i left her house at about 11:00. we trained/bussed to stanley park to see the aquarium. it was great! unfortunately, we had to go at 5, both because the place was closing and i had to get to the airport to catch my 8:50 flight. caitlan bussed with me to the airport and then we said goodbye and she headed home. i checked in for my flight, and saw that it had been delayed 4 hours. while i waited in the airport, the snow started falling harder and harder. the airport started shutting down runways and cancelling flights, and finally, at about 10:30, my flight was cancelled too. by that time, several flights had already been cancelled and there were more than 1000 angry, tired people who were waiting for the airlines to find hotels and new flights for them. i just called a hostel downtown and found out they had tons of room, so i took a couple of busses there and ended up staying for two nights. it was actually pretty enjoyable. my favourite part of travelling is the inconveniences that sometimes come up. i like problem solving, i guess. plus it gave me time to do some of the things i couldn't do earlier: visit the granville island market, walk around downtown, eat at a really incredible indian restaurant, and be by myself. i LOVE travelling by myself (although i also loved visiting with caitlan). i ended up getting a flight back to edmonton on the 23rd, two days after my original flight. i was lucky, too, because i think that people who got flights later than that ended up getting those cancelled as well on account of the weather. while i was waiting for my flight, the airport's fire alarm started going off very loudly, and didn't stop for about 25 minutes. i think i would count vancouver airport as my least favourite airport experience. i did get home safe and sound, though, and i drove to my parents' place the next day.

that is enough for one post, yeah? more later.

sad that you think that we're all just scenesters

hi friends.

i've been avoiding posting because SO MUCH has happened in the past few weeks. but i've got to get back into it sometime, right? here is a semi-chronological listing of some things that have happened since my last post:

-i had an interview with city hall for a tour guide position. they loved me and were ready to hire me, but i didn't have enough availability because of all my classes. boo. i would have loved that job.
-i had my third annual kickball party at hawrelak park on saturday, september 13th. some of my most-loved people were there, including emily, jessica, becky, jordan, stephanie, julia, and some of julia's friends. sorry that some of you missed it because you were in lake louise.
-made bannock at liam's house for a bunch of scenesters when i went over there to visit jessica and say goodbye to jenni (who was leaving on a 6-week band tour). is that mean to say that about the scenesters? maybe. it was shitty bannock and i was embarrassed of it. i really feel like i have to prove my bannock-making skills to jessica. i feel like as a result of that night, she doubts my awesome bannock-making abilities.
-jordan and i continued to hang out in much the same way we had before we "broke up"
-i irregularly started attended faculty of native studies students' association meetings. i really like the people on the association and would like to get more involved, but the meeting times are kind of inconvenient for me.
-had another interview, this time for doing presentations to high school students on their post-secondary options. it would have been a great job, and paid well, and it was the most fun interview i have ever done, but they ended up not hiring me because i didn't have a car. boo.
-in cree class one day, my teacher told our class that someone in the beginner cree class needed a tutor, and asked us if any of us would be willing to tutor. we were all really reluctant, and i think we all thought it would be volunteer, but i eventually stuck up my hand because no one else was, and i knew i had a pretty good grasp of beginner cree and would likely be able to help the student somewhat. it turns out it is a paying gig, so i get paid $25 an hour to tutor someone the most beautiful language i've ever heard! AND i ended up taking on two other students, although i meet with them slightly less and get paid slightly less than with the first student.
-i went for a walk in hawrelak park with my mom, and told her how much my dad was stressing me out by always trying to get me to get my life all planned out. it was a nice walk.
-after walking with my mom, i met jessica and becky and doug at my house, and doug drove us all in his van to calgary, where we stayed at kelsey's for the night. i brought my longboard, and in the evening all of us girls went longboarding/bike riding along the river. it felt sooo good. i really want to move to calgary some summer just to longboard. the next day, the four of us from edmonton plus kelsey drove to canmore to go caving at rat's nest cave. it was super fun. kelsey and i had been there together before, but the other three had never been caving. they had a good time, i think. the best was that doug's eyes were so sparkly and happy and awefilled or something whenever we turned around to look at him with our headlamps. cute. also, i had been sick all weekend with a cold, so i took some neocitran in the morning before we left, not realizing that it induced drowsiness. i ended up feeling incredibly sick to my stomach by the time we got to canmore, and wasn't sure i was going to be able to cave at all. luckily, i felt better after about half an hour. our tour guide operates a dog sledding operation in canmore, so i want to try to get a bunch of people together to do that this winter. on the way home from canmore, we stopped in calgary to drop kelsey off and to get doug a hot dog from tubby dog. i do not like hot dogs, but these grossed me out even more than i thought possible. becky ate her hot dog with crushed potato chips all on top of it. kelsey's veggie dog had peanut butter and jam and cap'n crunch cereal. doug's hot dog was wrapped in bacon and then deep fried, and topped off with a fried egg and some sauteed onions and i think maybe even some other gross things. ew.
-i went to my friend meghan's birthday party at the kingsway moxie's, and had a good time talking with her and our friend kevin.
-i gave an oral presentation to my values/ethics/sustainability graduate-level course on traditional ecological knowledge, and i felt really really good about it. i really like giving oral presentations. some of my classmates hate it. i can't understand why. easy marks!
-at the end of the month, i felt irritated towards jordan for ditching me on a number of fun activities we had planned, and that i had really looked forward to.

that's it for september. i'll try to give a more detailed overview of october sometime in the near future.

love cdg

put your circuits in the sea

i post whenever i am asked to. natasha asked. here is my post.

i am back in edmonton. i have been since august 20th. so, almost 3 weeks. here's a little rundown:
-jordan surprised me at the airport with flowers as my parents looked on, beaming and snapping pictures. i was embarrassed.
-i only hung out very briefly with a few friends for the week after i got back. that included hanging at becky's, running errands with jonathan in st. albert, meeting julia at good earth café, going to see "pineapple express" (which was TERRIBLE - we wanted to go see "dark knight" but arrived too late) with kevin, and then lots and lots of time with jordan.
-i drove to athabasca to pick jessica up from camp there, where she had worked for the last month. seeing her felt like the opposite of leaving caitlan. like, all the same feelings, but backwards. it was, i think, my happiest day all summer. we had a very beautiful time in the woods and sleeping in her cabin, and talking and talking and talking. i am very glad to have her. on the way back to edmonton the next day, we stopped at a sketchy hotel restaurant in legal for lunch, and had some INCREDIBLE burgers and fries. seriously. incredible. stop there if you are ever headed up that way.
-i reluctantly got my first injection of gardasil, after being assured by my dad's insurance company that they would pay for all three doses. gardasil is that semi-controversial drug they've been giving to grade 5 girls - controversial because christian parents think it will make their elementary-aged kids start having sex - to protect against 2 types of cervical cancer and 2 types of genital warts caused by HPV. each injection costs $150, and you need 3. i didn't want to get it, but the pharmacist very correctly pointed out that we generally pay more than that in car insurance every year, and you would definitely rather have insurance than have to deal with something if it came about. so, if you are reading this and have not gotten your gardasil shots, i would recommend looking into it. then you can make your own decision.
-i continued to feel that i didn't get enough alone time this summer, and that manifested itself in me being irritable and even shaky when i was around my friends and jordan.
-jordan came to my parents' house for the weekend, and my parents totally fell in love with him. that freaked me out and made me crave space even more.
-school started, and the workload is already stressing me out. i realized i would need to devote a significantly larger amount of time to schoolwork than i ever have before. that means less social time.
-jordan and i mutually and amicably decided that a "relationship" would be too difficult and frustrating to navigate/maintain right now, given my need for space and stress over school. i don't think much has REALLY changed, but things feel more fluid and less stressful.
-i am doing this non-profit board internship through the university of alberta at the nina haggerty centre for the arts, and i went to my first board meeting tonight. i am excited about the organization and about helping out with their major annual fundraiser, cakewalk.
-i went for afternoon tea at rutherford house yesterday with jessica, julia, julia's friend anna, stephanie, and my sisters. becky and shannon were both too sick to come. the rest of us had a really nice time, and will probably make it a monthly thing. let me know if you want to join us. we would likely love to have you.
-went to bri and bethany's for a party last night. as usual, i dreaded going to a party, so i mostly stayed in the shadows and just talked to the people i knew fairly well, which included, chronologically, bri, dave, natasha, joel, bethany, lewis, and karen. dave made a sauna out of a tent and a pail of hot rocks, and i am now committed to trying to do it at my parents' sometime.

now i have to get back to my article summaries. gah. i have to read and summarize 9 articles this week, and then read another 6 without summarizing them. ugh. i used to be able to get away with not cracking a textbook for an entire semester. i guess 5 years of doing that is catching up with me.

the 'fax of life

okayyy...

i've been away from church point for just over a week now, but it feels like it was eons ago. here's a brief summary of my last little bit there:
-i spoke a lot of english. i didn't even try to hide it. i spoke it in the cafeteria, in the petit bois, on the beach, in my room, everywhere. and not one avertissement. woo!
-i ended up with 98% as my final mark in the course, which wasn't very satisfying because the course was so simple and just a repetition of what i learned a long time ago. i decided i WOULD like to continue on with french, though, because... i don't know. it's a good thing to have, and i like learning.
-a grammy-nominated creole fiddler almost kissed me, but i avoided it by delicately telling him i have a boyfriend.
-i loved someone faster than i have ever loved before, i think. her name is caitlan and she is lovely. our spirits like each other a lot. i think we broke my jessica-loving record, but maybe not. i sure loved jessie j. pretty quickly.
-i cried when caitlan left (she had to head out a few days early for a wedding in PEI). i have hardly cried at all in the last two years, and i used to do it all the time. i miss it. it felt really satisfying.
-i wrote a lot of letters. i sent at least 50 to friends and family. a lot of those were to jordan.
-i learned more than i used to know about mardi gras. it is neat, and i'd like to go sometime.
-i didn't end up loving the land as much as i thought i would, and won't be too sad if i never return there.
-i am confused. i don't know if it is good or bad. probably both. this summer has been quite a different experience than my usual summers up north. i feel like i still haven't had my much-needed alone time to decompress from the rest of the year and the summer itself.

now i am in halifax. i am staying with my friend erica, who just moved here from edmonton last month. we rowed together on the u of a team last fall, and now she's coming here for design school. before halifax, i was in PEI, where i absolutely fell in love. PEI is the first place outside alberta where i really feel i could live. i think that's probably because it is very similar to alberta, with its rolling farmland and quiet and unpretentiousness. charlottetown is beautiful and i hope that one day i can grow up and be quiet and make sweaters and crafts there. the hostel i stayed at was incredible, and my stay was made even better by the presence of caitlan, who stayed at her relatives' house during the night but came into town to hang out with me every day i was there. we ate some amazing meals, visited some small shops, saw the legislature and some amazing old churches, visited green gables in cavendish and hung out on the beach. so nice. i joined a tour group on wednesday the 13th, and we revisited cavendish, biked along the beach, drove across confederation bridge (which is incredible!) and stopped for pictures, visited some small towns and farmers' markets in nova scotia, saw the "bluenose II," camped overnight in a tipi in the rain, went for a wine tasting at a little winery, rode inner tubes down a beautiful river, and played in the mud flats along the bay of fundy. now i have just 2 more sleeps until i go home. i can't wait to be back home, but i wish i could have spent more time in PEI. (in case you're wondering, halifax is pretty great too. my qualms with PEI and halifax are these: PEI has no forests, and i need forests; halifax is a little too young and a little to art-scene for me. but both are definitely live-able for me. maybe i will move here sometime.)

semaine 3

okay. i should update. there's a lot to say.

first off: i never really liked french. i thought maybe 7 years away from it would change things, but nope. i still don't like it. that makes it really hard for me to learn it. i LOVE learning cree, so i am excited to do assignments and practice and let the words roll off my tongue. it is not so with french. on top of not liking the language, i am also getting confused, because my brain wants to say an english sentence, then it translates it into broken cree, and then realizes that cree isn't the language i wanted, so it re-translates it into broken french. i am just sick of having my conversations limited to, "il fait froid," and "j'ai faim," and "est-ce que tu veux aller à la chateau avec moi?" i end up cheating and having a lot of secret whispered english conversations.

it is weird not having most of my thoughts consumed by "native issues." this is really the first time since king's that i haven't worked with/lived with/studied aboriginal people and/or issues. i kind of forgot that other realities existed.

canada post is doing a great job of delivering the letters i've written (which numbers about 25 so far), but is doing a shit job of delivering any to me. i am feeling very forgotten about, even thought i KNOW some of my friends have sent stuff in the mail within the last week.

school here is kind of a drag. the stuff we are learning is stuff i already know, but have forgotten since high school. it is frustrating that most of the exercises my class does are very childish. i wish that they taught french here the way dorothy teaches cree at the u of a. i think i might be a little more excited about it. also, my workshops sometimes tend to get a little childish. BUT...

there are some great things about being here. first, i am learning a ton about acadian history. i have always been really bad at understanding history, because i never really had something solid to anchor all those dates to. but now that i have a decent understanding of the western treaties in canada, and some of the things that led up to them (the royal proclamation of 1763, for instance), i can understand our history a little better. i guess i forgot whatever i had been taught about the acadians, but they have a pretty fascinating history. a lot of the students here are cajun from louisiana, so we've had a few louisianaise parties (mardi gras, some cajun music, etc.). i have always always always wanted to go to the deep south, and this makes me want to go even more. learning about the acadians is good for me within the context of native studies, because it kind of shows the kind of assimilation tactics/fear that was happening BETWEEN EUROPEAN GROUPS.

i can't wait to get back to edmonton! i readjusted my courses for the fall and winter terms, and i am stoked! i will be taking the second level of cree, alberta archaeology, northwest coast archaeology, aboriginal cultural foundations, native economic development, natural resource management for aboriginal communities, social and economic impact assessments, a second level of research methods in native studies, and... one more course. i haven't decided which yet. it will probably be a community-service learning one so i can get my CSL certification. i love love love love love school! i am also hoping to apply for a master's program at the u of a, for a start date of september 2009. the department of rural economy hopes to introduce a master of science program in risk and community resilience. whoa! awesome! so i am trying to get all my prerequisites in order, which is no problem, because they all seem interesting. also, when i get back, i am gonna go up north and pick jessie up from long lake camp. i think after that we MIGHT go to sucker creek/high prairie to say hi to some peeps/some land. my momma and i (and i really hope jordan) are planning to go to métis crossing for a festival there on august 23-24. i also wanna visit robin in red deer, and see kelsey when she gets back from amsterdam and go skating with her in calgary, and go spelunking in canmore or jasper with lots of people i love. before all that, though, i am going to have a nice solo vacation in charlottetown and halifax for 10 days. i am gonna go to avonlea, so if you want me to give gus pike a kiss for you, you'd better let me know now. or if you want some anne of green gables shit. woo!

tonight is christmas. i made some mittens for the person whose name i pulled, but i don't even know who she is. joyeux noel!

here, we get 3 warnings if we speak english (or get caught on english websites). i haven't gotten any yet, but i should really have a million. i kind of feel like i am mario. i need to find some boxes with question marks on them to get some more free lives.

semaine deux

this week was kinda sucky for a few reasons: 1. i hate the workshop that my group is in this week. it is just dumb icebreaker-type games in a classroom. boring. childish. 2. i am pms-ing. 3. i haven't gotten any mail from jordan (or anyone else) yet. 4. my name hasn't been drawn for any of the little field trips this week. 5. my class is too easy for me, i think. but it is okay. i think this week will be the worst. after it, the mail will start flowing in, and my workshops will change to better ones, and my pms will be over, and hopefully class will start to get a little more challenging. tomorrow we are going on a boat trip to hopefully see whales (les baleines) and seals (les foques). tonight we are having a tex-mex party, and tomorrow we are having a louisiannaise/mardi gras party, because a lot of the students here are from louisianna. i like that i am learning a tiny bit of history about the acadians/cajuns/french/british, because it definitely will help me understand history for native people here and west of mississippi better. i didn't do a whole lot this week because my name wasn't drawn for any of the field trips. i mostly just napped, typed letters, and crocheted. i DID manage to get some old favorites (in english!) out from the bilingual library here, so i've been chillin in my room with edward estlin, john donne, milty, ondaatje, and huck finn and tom sawyer. i think i'd go crazy without those boys.

je ne comprends pas

so. i am in nova scotia - "nouvelle écosse." i`m doing a 5-week french immersion program at université sainte-anne in church point, nova scotia (pointe-de-l`église, nouvelle-écosse). i left edmonton at 1:00 a.m. on sunday morning, when my parents and jordan saw me off. i will interrupt this post on nova scotia to give an update on jordan:

he is a dreamboat and i like him a lot. on saturday we went to his opa`s in beaumont and weeded a row of carrots. his opa is a gardener by trade. afterwards we went inside, and on the way, jordan`s opa presented me with a bouquet of freshly-picked flowers from his garden. adorable. he invited us inside for some "cool watermelon," and then jordan and i had to leave to make it to hobbema in time to catch the end of the afternoon session of the powwow there. jordan had never been to a powwow, and so it was super, super nice to bring him and have him enjoy it as much as he did. we liked the dancing, but especially liked the powwow food. i had an "indian taco" (a regular taco, but ON TOP OF FRIED BANNOCK!!!) and he had some amazing fresh corn on the cob. we drove home and i finished packing, and he came over so we could watch the final star wars together. then my parents came over (calling half an hour before they arrived to say, "get your clothes back on!" ha.), and all four of us drove out to the airport. they saw me off, and my parents told me later that my mom had asked jordan on the way home what he planned on doing for the rest of the summer, to which he replied, "you mean aside from pining for your daughter?" cute. i think that`s a good sign. anyways. we are not e-mailing or calling each other while i am gone, but plan on writing and sending letters frequently. like we`re in 1908. cute.

anyway. now i am in church point. look it up on google maps, or mapquest if you prefer. on sunday we settled into our rooms - i have my own room in the "beaulieu" residence. i am relieved to have my own room. most of the people here are a lot younger than me - some are 13 or 14! - but everyone in my residence is my age or older. whew. the reason i chose this university for the program is because it is so isolated, and i really need to go somewhere rural and quiet every summer to recuperate from being in the city. as a result, i am remaining kind of antisocial. i just need some space for my own mental/emotional/spiritual well-being. luckily, the person i like hanging out with most is my next door neighbour. she is a girl named andrea who is 24 and from regina, and she is taking international studies. we are at about the same level in french, so it is nice to be able to talk (or not talk) with her.

on monday night we signed contracts saying we would not speak english until the last night of our stay here (august 8th). if we get caught speaking it 3 times, we get sent home. eeks! it is mostly hard for me to remember to speak french when i just get up from a nap. my brain is not working yet even in english, so to make it think in french is next to impossible. after that, we had a "vin et fromage" party, but andrea and i didn`t stay long because we were so tired.

on tuesday we started classes. i am in "débutant 1," because i have forgotten most of the french i learned in the 7 years leading up to my last french class, which was 7 years ago. it is definitely the most appropriate class for me, though. we have just done simple sentences and the verbs "avoir" and "être" yesterday and today, and they are good refreshers. i have class from 8:00 a.m. until 9:30, and then we have a half hour "session dìnformation," where we find out what activities are happening later that day. then i have class again from 10:00 until 11:30, and then lunch, and then free time until 2, when we have some activities. because i am a beginner, i am in the "conversation" class, which means that my group rotates around through the other activities and gets a taste of each of them. this week i am working in "le petit bois" - the little woods/forest. there are a series of pathways that the first missionaries here built, and we are helping to maintain them and some other little gardens. today we helped weed some flowerbeds, which i usually hate doing but found surprisingly enjoyable, probably because it wasn`t boiling hot out and there were a lot of us helping out to make the job go quickly.

this is getting very long. i will write more later. here is a reminder to myself of what to write about: "les olympiques comiques," "balle-molle," english-cree-french.